Handling Failures: An art leading to success
By Dr. Ashutosh Karnatak
Success is consequence of positive attitude, Perseverance and patience, but in the journey of life, we encounter many failures, which depress us and changes course of life. Each such event is result of deficient reaction of different inputs with our system resulting into undesired results.
Failures are started being faced by us from the childhood itself, when we are not able to secure marks commensuration with the efforts made and our parents scold us. From this failure onwards, series of failures are faced. Do you count some of them. The effect of failure is felt more, when we are more attached with the results.
As such, the word "failure" doesn't deserve any place in the dictionary because this word does not exist at all. Consequence of any action result into some output in terms of outcome. Only results are produced .It is outcome only nothing as a failure, being not successful is also an outcome which need to be treated as same as successful outcome. The term “Failure” have adverse impact on the psychological frame of mind. Any outcome makes us enriched by addition in experience, which could be utilized in our future actions. So, let the Failure be renamed as “No Success”.
Now, feel the difference –
• When you think of Failure
• When you think of "No Success".
In first case, reaction is visualizing yourself as a broken person –thinking that all is lost , nothing there in life to carry forward , whereas in the second case the reaction would be that success could not be achieved but some thing might have been gone wrong and you don’t feel as a broken person .Failure is the pessimistic emotion whereas “No Success” is optimistic emotion . Famous story of Thomas Edison tells about this. After he tried 9999 times to perfect the light bulb and had not succeeded, someone asked him, “Are you going to have ten thousand failures?. He answered, “I didn't fail. I just discovered another way to discover it.
Causes of "No Success" situation: Success is consequence of clear goals, right strategy blended with proper planning. Converse to this leads to "No Success" situation, one of them can be attributed to this result /outcome.
• Most of the time unclear goals are responsible for it. Introspect one of your "No success" cases and analyze clarity part of it . Goal need to be clear to your head and heart both.
• Wrong Strategy
• Untimely actions: Actions are required to be synchronized with the requirement .It is basically upto individual to use the specific action in getting the goal. When, which weapon is required to be used, it's an art.
Most of the time "No Success" situation is being faced by most of us, but still we have to survive in this life. Following re some of the techniques to handle such situation and becoming happy.
How to handle it:
• Don't get stressed, failure is part of life: Failures are only result or outcome. No one in this life can calm that in every undertaking he has received success. Being successful is comparative –for someone it is on the higher side whereas for others it may be on lower side. So don’t get stressed on this account as failures are part of life.
• Don't allow self-downgrading: In this life most important is to maintain self-respect in your own eyes. It has been seen that after repeated failures, one finds that his /her family members loose respect for him. One gets ridiculed from his family members and from environment and consequently he starts searching deficiencies within self and losses self-confidence/esteem and once one plunge into this phenomenon. It become every difficult to recover. Thus, if one treats failure as "No success", then one can avoid into plunging into this.
• Identifying skill set required for the job: It is part of strategy to achieve any goal. It is essential to identify the skill set required for carrying out any job. It is not true that any body can do any job. Most of the failures are on this account. It has been seen that parents send their children to professional colleges, but they don’t get success. Most of the time, parents feel that their ward has desired skill set but actually they have not.
• Have emotional Control: Any failure leads to emotional disturbance and its duration depends on individual. For some one it can be for shorter duration, whereas for somebody it can be longer. But this factor needs to be controlled. Man is the only member in this universe who has one conscious mind, which can be used to control emotions. Further, a person who has competence to have control over emotions, bounces back to normal easily and start actions for future with ray of hope.
• Develop bank of energy: After any failure, most of us are out of energy and therefore, it takes time to resurrect back. At this time, you can withdraw, some energy from "energy Bank", which you have been developed by you during positive periods. Therefore, it is also essential to develop energy bank as much as possible, so that it could be at the time of need and this bank grow exponentially if one maintains positive attitude in life . Give yourself a thoroughly good shaking up and you will return to your work with renewed energy.
• Identifying short and long term goals, write it down: In our life it is essential that goals are identified. We read this subject many a times but how far we identify our goals, introspection can only tell. Don't ever go for a lengthy list as most of time it is felt that everything is required in life but when we attempt for all , nothing is achieved . Better slowly and steadily win the race of life. Draw short term goals for a month and long term goal for the year. Goals need to be SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Timely) .With this definition, one ca n identify their goals.
• Get rid of Fear from Failure: One of predominant reason of any failure is fear of getting failure. It has been seen that as one thinks, same is the result. If you feel that you will not succeed then 98% times you may not succeed because your actions were not commensuration with the requirement and on the top of it fear of failure also disturbs the emotional balance. Great Philosopher has mentioned in his book "Fear from Unknown" that most of the time men is troubled by fear from unknown. Stop for a moment and think, whether you are also victim of this. In fact phenomenon of FEAR is a psychological disorder, which is required to be corrected by individual. One may visualize that outcome of any undertaking is either Success or No Success, so where is the element of failure. Since the fear of No Success comes to our mind, which disturbs alignment of our different energy setup and ultimately we land up with "No Success". Efforts are required to convert Fear of Failure to Joy of Success, It automatically converts our mental, emotional and energy alignment towards success.
• Review the progress: Reviewing the outcome of action taken for any work is very essential. Based on the requirement of the job undertaken it can be done broadly on the following guidelines:
a) Schedule Vs Actual Progress
b) Adequacy of deployment of resources like efforts, time, etc .
c) Corrective actions required to be taken, if any
With this analysis, one can fairly achieve the success. This formula can be implemented not only in professional life, but also in educational progress of your child, affairs pertaining to home etc.
• Study inspiring stories of successful persons: As explained above that all the time success is not feasible but essential is haw fast one gets normalized to take up the fresh challenge of life. At this time, one of the panacea is to take inspiration from the moments of your past successes .Better visualize them internally, it would elate you and help you to come out of the situation. In fact it helps in production of hormones, which makes one happy. Another way is to read story of great successful persons and visualize them inside you. You would find a new courage, spirit inside you to face the world and shall help you to bounce back.
• Good Parenting: It is for the parents to teach their children on handling failures, as it is not taught in any school being most important aspect of life .To deal with success and failure in a healthy manner, it is important that children develop the right attitude towards learning Once they have realized what it means to do well, they begin to set their own goals and standards of achievement and judge how close their performance comes to match their set goals.
• Detach from results: Last but not the least, failures could be handled properly, if results are detached in lines of preaching from Holy Geeta, wherein it has been taught that the man should do only actions and should not be anxious about the result. When it is done failures would not disturb us.
Thus, based on the above, one can start administration failures renamed as "No Success" situations.